This is a lot to contend with all at once, but Galahad is determined to try and walk through it all slowly with the angel if they can. It's clear that all of this is bothering him more than he's let on before, and the knight wants to try and do what he can to help them both through it.
Reaching out, he lays a light touch on one of the angel's arms and tugs to ease him towards the nearest place for them to sit together. The pair of men sitting next to one another is an (unintended, this time) invitation that both fizzgigs recognize, and soon enough the two creatures are rolling up and scrambling up onto the cushions beside them to cuddle.
"How do imagine your curses from God might affect me?" This is the first time he's ever heard Beelzebub talk about himself in these terms and it seems worth trying to dig into them more. As he listens, the knight moves the touch on the angel's arm to one of his hands instead. He wraps both of his own hands loosely around the other man's in a warm, reassuring hold.
Once they are seated the angel does lean in, for comfort and closeness. "I don't know."
He really doesn't, not only his own interactions being this close to someone, nor enough about Galahad's vows to know what might be broken. There is generalized worry driving the feelings and he grasps for something that might explain. It takes him awhile to come up with words, in part because there is some nervousness about speaking so poorly about something Galahad obviously believes; the goodness of God.
"I was cursed to crave drinking, to lust for it beyond reason." That part was easy. God spoke similar words during the fall. The rest is hazy. "God took things from us. He ripped most of my self control out. I know he took Temperence from me. I can't regain it. I've tried."
When Beelzebub comes closer to him, the knight shifts so that the angel can lean against him as much as he may like. He's noticed that closeness seems to help the other man in moments like these, and it's something he welcomes, too.
Galahad waits patiently as the angel works to get his feelings out and explain himself. He nods along as his listens, his brow creasing with thought.
"So you fear that you may not be able to stop yourself in some way? Or-- stop yourself from not reacting in an uncontrolled way?"
"Yes but..." He doesn't have the words at hand, so wraps his arms around Galahad while he tries to find them. "Angels, fallen or not, are created to manipulate. I have abilities that humans can't resist."
The words had come slow and he's not sure they are the right ones but it will keep the conversation going. One thing he values about Galahad is the way he asks questions. It helps Beelzebub sort his thoughts when it comes to the ideas he's never had reason to think about. "What if the curses I carry compel me to use them?"
The knight encourages the leaning against him and Beelzebub's arms coming around him. He reaches out to gently stroke the long hair hanging down the angel's back, looking to try and offer what comfort he can while he listens.
It's strange, perhaps, but as Galahad takes in Beelzebub's words he doesn't feel overly worried about the idea that his lover might affect him or change somehow because of his powers. Beelzebub has been nothing but kind and careful with him in the past. If what the angel is describing is going to happen, he thinks he would have seen some sign of it already-- especially during those times when Beelzebub has been very drunk around him, or in the moments where the angel has been beside himself with upset.
"Well," the knight's fingers hesitate in the long, sandy locks as he chooses his words carefully. "Is it something that's happened to you before with any of your powers? Do you remember a time when your powers compelled you to affect humans and you couldn't stop yourself?"
The angel settles against Galahad, shifting wings to make it easier to stroke his hair, because it feels good. He's quiet listening to the questions. They worry Beelzebub, or his answers to them do.
Silence hangs for a time before a heavy sigh breaks it. "I don't know. Probably. I've never cared if they did before."
He's trying to think but there's difficulty determining what might be the norm for a human and what might be the influence of his sins or abilities.
"If you don't remember any incidents, maybe it's not as bad as you fear it could be?" he suggests. "From how you describe your powers, I would think the affects on humans would be noticeable."
"I don't know." He was saying that so much that it was becoming uncomfortable. He felt like he should know, somehow.
"I corrupt, manipulate, and cause people to succumb to thier sins. I'm not sure I'd notice.." He admits, but it isn't easy. Slowly he pulls away, enough to look into Galahad's eyes. "I don't want my curses to dishonor you."
"I don't understand any of this the way you or your family do," Galahad starts slowly. "But I've never felt anything like that from you, or seen it happen in the time I've been around you." He looks Beelzebub over, his face pulling into a concerned frown. "Even during those times when you've had a lot to drink. If your curses affecting humans was something that happens to you often, wouldn't we have seen it by now in all of the time we've spent together?"
It's a sound reasoning but the worry is still there. The topic mattered so much to the angel that the worry was unlikely to abate. He laid back down against Galahad. "I'm concerned. Lucifer has the same kind of concern about his lover."
His king having the same concerns made it more concrete even if neither angel had any proof of an issue.
The hair stroking brings a smile and a gentle nuzzle into the crook of the human's neck. Worried, he will remain but he's relaxing again.
"I trust you, if you say there's nothing." He shakes his where he's found a comfortable place to lay his head on the knight's shoulder. "I don't care about the other people."
Galahad is interested in the idea of making sure nobody ends up influenced, but one step at a time. He smiles as he feels Beelzebub relax against him, and turns his head to press a kiss into the angel's hair.
"Aye. But this does make me think... What if there were further precautions we could take? Even if they weren't perfect, if we figured something out you'd have less to worry about."
"But if you are worried about your curses, should we not try to do something about them?" Galahad knows there's nothing they can do about removing them completely, but he remembers Beelzebub telling him about the steps that were taken to protect humans from Sin's affects on them. If the angels could accomplish that, it seems possible to him that they might be able to figure something out for Beelzebub, too.
"It couldn't hurt, aye? Especially if you are worried that something could happen to both of us." Because from what the angel's told him, if his vow did end up breaking it would result in consequences for both of them.
He's glad, though, to hear that Beelzebub's at least thinking about asking. Even though it seems unlikely to him that the angel might affect him if it hasn't happened already, he doesn't think it's a bad idea to be prepared.
"Who are you thinking of asking?" A beat, and then he guesses, "Lucifer?"
If he could stay here for the next several days straight he wouldn't care. Something about this position, despite it being slightly cramped and awkward for the angel on a normal sized couch, triggered his sloth in a way that could only be called romantic.
"Yes." He confirmed sighing almost sleepily at the comfort. "Belial and Moloch, too."
That response brings a bright smile to the knight's face, and he turns his head to kiss the angel's forehead again.
"I'm glad to hear that. We'll figure something out so we don't have to worry about something happening to either of us, I know it." It's more of a feeling, really, but with this first step taken Galahad can't help but feel hopeful. There's little he wouldn't do for Beelzebub to be able to keep him in his life, so whatever he can help him do with regards to his curses, the knight wants to apply himself to.
A kiss to the neck and another just behind the ear before Beelzebub shifts to get a little more comfortable and take some of his weight off the smaller human.
"Sin's partner wears a piece of jewelry that carries the wards." It couldn't help to prepare Galahad for what an option might look like. There's a pause and then a curious inquiry. "You don't know the extent of my abilities?"
The concept is very strange to the angel. They'd spoken about so many things and yet what he was didn't seem to be among them.
"That would be easy to take on." The kisses to his neck and then the spot behind his ear taken together earn a small shiver from the knight, and he happily melts a bit into his partner's side as the other man sits up more properly beside him. As soon as the angel does move, Cerberus seizes the opportunity to plant himself in the warmth of Galahad's lap. After a moment, one of the knight's hands comes out to stroke the creature absently.
"Mm? Oh, well I know that you can influence people to drink, or that you might make them lose some sight of themselves." With their heavier conversation finished, he's feeling more relaxed and distracted.
Kilgharrah must have gotten jealous because it finds its way to the crook of Beelzebub's wing and instantly nestles its smaller body among the downy feathers as if it were a nest. The angel was so used to someone/thing burying itself in his feathers that it is comforting in the way a favorite worn out shirt is comfortable. The unoccupied wing wraps completely around Galahad, leaving a tent like space in his lap for the miscellaneous animals that would no doubt join them if they remained cuddling for too long.
"There are abilities most of the fallen angels have; healing, shape-shifting, resurrection, empathy, telepathy, telekinesis, a few others." Despite these being objectively powerful abilities, Beelzebub talks about them in the same tone someone might use when applying it to a mundane human skill like putting on shoes. "I have abilities that are unique to me; from heaven and my curses."
The soft warmth of one of Beelzebub's wings wrapping around him is quickly becoming one of Galahad's favorite things ever. It's his turn now to wrap an arm loosely around the angel's torso, and he does so as he shifts over so they can cuddle close again.
He nods along as Beelzebub explains angelic powers, the fingers of his free hand dragging happily through the tinier fizzgig's wild fur. In response, the creature stops eying its much larger sibling suspiciously and gives a contented half-growl, half-murring sound as it buries itself further into the soft fabrics of Galahad's lap.
"Tell me about them," he encourages, as Beelzebub brings up his own abilities.
This is delightful and Beelzebub slips into a lazy sort of conversation. It's nice to just sit and talk with no rush. He falls into near petting Galahad's shoulder and arm as they talk.
"I have many. Some are from the prayers I answer." Maybe those would be the easiest to start with. "I can inspire people with my voice, and bless weapons. My duties to warriors includes easing the death of those dying on the field and seeing to assisting those who are damaged from war, especially mental damage and horrors that linger with them. I see to the health of warriors recovering from battle wounds, particularly those defending their homes and families."
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Date: 2020-03-08 04:52 am (UTC)Reaching out, he lays a light touch on one of the angel's arms and tugs to ease him towards the nearest place for them to sit together. The pair of men sitting next to one another is an (unintended, this time) invitation that both fizzgigs recognize, and soon enough the two creatures are rolling up and scrambling up onto the cushions beside them to cuddle.
"How do imagine your curses from God might affect me?" This is the first time he's ever heard Beelzebub talk about himself in these terms and it seems worth trying to dig into them more. As he listens, the knight moves the touch on the angel's arm to one of his hands instead. He wraps both of his own hands loosely around the other man's in a warm, reassuring hold.
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Date: 2020-03-08 05:27 am (UTC)He really doesn't, not only his own interactions being this close to someone, nor enough about Galahad's vows to know what might be broken. There is generalized worry driving the feelings and he grasps for something that might explain. It takes him awhile to come up with words, in part because there is some nervousness about speaking so poorly about something Galahad obviously believes; the goodness of God.
"I was cursed to crave drinking, to lust for it beyond reason." That part was easy. God spoke similar words during the fall. The rest is hazy. "God took things from us. He ripped most of my self control out. I know he took Temperence from me. I can't regain it. I've tried."
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Date: 2020-03-08 02:52 pm (UTC)Galahad waits patiently as the angel works to get his feelings out and explain himself. He nods along as his listens, his brow creasing with thought.
"So you fear that you may not be able to stop yourself in some way? Or-- stop yourself from not reacting in an uncontrolled way?"
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Date: 2020-03-08 03:02 pm (UTC)The words had come slow and he's not sure they are the right ones but it will keep the conversation going. One thing he values about Galahad is the way he asks questions. It helps Beelzebub sort his thoughts when it comes to the ideas he's never had reason to think about. "What if the curses I carry compel me to use them?"
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Date: 2020-03-08 06:46 pm (UTC)It's strange, perhaps, but as Galahad takes in Beelzebub's words he doesn't feel overly worried about the idea that his lover might affect him or change somehow because of his powers. Beelzebub has been nothing but kind and careful with him in the past. If what the angel is describing is going to happen, he thinks he would have seen some sign of it already-- especially during those times when Beelzebub has been very drunk around him, or in the moments where the angel has been beside himself with upset.
"Well," the knight's fingers hesitate in the long, sandy locks as he chooses his words carefully. "Is it something that's happened to you before with any of your powers? Do you remember a time when your powers compelled you to affect humans and you couldn't stop yourself?"
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Date: 2020-03-08 07:01 pm (UTC)Silence hangs for a time before a heavy sigh breaks it. "I don't know. Probably. I've never cared if they did before."
He's trying to think but there's difficulty determining what might be the norm for a human and what might be the influence of his sins or abilities.
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Date: 2020-03-08 07:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-03-08 07:33 pm (UTC)"I corrupt, manipulate, and cause people to succumb to thier sins. I'm not sure I'd notice.." He admits, but it isn't easy. Slowly he pulls away, enough to look into Galahad's eyes. "I don't want my curses to dishonor you."
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Date: 2020-03-08 07:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-03-08 08:11 pm (UTC)His king having the same concerns made it more concrete even if neither angel had any proof of an issue.
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Date: 2020-03-08 08:15 pm (UTC)"Would it help if we went out of our way to be more careful?" A beat. "Or if we tried to figure out a way to protect the people around you?"
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Date: 2020-03-08 08:34 pm (UTC)"I trust you, if you say there's nothing." He shakes his where he's found a comfortable place to lay his head on the knight's shoulder. "I don't care about the other people."
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Date: 2020-03-08 08:45 pm (UTC)"Aye. But this does make me think... What if there were further precautions we could take? Even if they weren't perfect, if we figured something out you'd have less to worry about."
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Date: 2020-03-08 08:57 pm (UTC)"I'm supposed to influence people. Everything I do isn't related to my curses."
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Date: 2020-03-08 09:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-03-08 09:23 pm (UTC)The laughter settles and he shrugs. "I can ask but my curses are not like Sin's"
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Date: 2020-03-08 09:32 pm (UTC)He's glad, though, to hear that Beelzebub's at least thinking about asking. Even though it seems unlikely to him that the angel might affect him if it hasn't happened already, he doesn't think it's a bad idea to be prepared.
"Who are you thinking of asking?" A beat, and then he guesses, "Lucifer?"
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Date: 2020-03-08 09:45 pm (UTC)"Yes." He confirmed sighing almost sleepily at the comfort. "Belial and Moloch, too."
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Date: 2020-03-08 09:52 pm (UTC)"I'm glad to hear that. We'll figure something out so we don't have to worry about something happening to either of us, I know it." It's more of a feeling, really, but with this first step taken Galahad can't help but feel hopeful. There's little he wouldn't do for Beelzebub to be able to keep him in his life, so whatever he can help him do with regards to his curses, the knight wants to apply himself to.
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Date: 2020-03-08 10:03 pm (UTC)"Sin's partner wears a piece of jewelry that carries the wards." It couldn't help to prepare Galahad for what an option might look like. There's a pause and then a curious inquiry. "You don't know the extent of my abilities?"
The concept is very strange to the angel. They'd spoken about so many things and yet what he was didn't seem to be among them.
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Date: 2020-03-08 10:09 pm (UTC)"Mm? Oh, well I know that you can influence people to drink, or that you might make them lose some sight of themselves." With their heavier conversation finished, he's feeling more relaxed and distracted.
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Date: 2020-03-08 10:23 pm (UTC)"There are abilities most of the fallen angels have; healing, shape-shifting, resurrection, empathy, telepathy, telekinesis, a few others." Despite these being objectively powerful abilities, Beelzebub talks about them in the same tone someone might use when applying it to a mundane human skill like putting on shoes. "I have abilities that are unique to me; from heaven and my curses."
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Date: 2020-03-08 10:36 pm (UTC)He nods along as Beelzebub explains angelic powers, the fingers of his free hand dragging happily through the tinier fizzgig's wild fur. In response, the creature stops eying its much larger sibling suspiciously and gives a contented half-growl, half-murring sound as it buries itself further into the soft fabrics of Galahad's lap.
"Tell me about them," he encourages, as Beelzebub brings up his own abilities.
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Date: 2020-03-08 11:14 pm (UTC)"I have many. Some are from the prayers I answer." Maybe those would be the easiest to start with. "I can inspire people with my voice, and bless weapons. My duties to warriors includes easing the death of those dying on the field and seeing to assisting those who are damaged from war, especially mental damage and horrors that linger with them. I see to the health of warriors recovering from battle wounds, particularly those defending their homes and families."